Funny positive quotes to keep you smiling and pumped


Ditch the usual preachy positive quotes and go for some fun. Come to us for witty positive quotes that will give you a boost of confidence and good laughs.

  1. “When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.” – Unknown
  2. “Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese.” – Billie Burke
  3. “Change is not a four letter word… but often your reaction to it is!” – Jeffrey Gitomer
  4. “Every tattoo is temporary, because we’re all slowly dying.” – Unknown
  5. “I am an early bird and a night owl… so I am wise and I have worms.” – Michael Scott
  6. “Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.” – Robert Bloch
  7. “I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.” – Oscar Wilde
  8. “If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.” – Steven Wright
  9. “It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous.” – Robert Benchley
  10. “You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?” – Steven Wright


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